“Those who do not learn from history are destined
to repeat it”. George Santayana
In fourteen hundred and ninety two
Columbus sailed the ocean blue.
Never in the recorded history of our world
has one man so utterly failed
at accomplishing his task at hand
yet been so richly rewarded
and fondly remembered.
If you tattooed a valentine on Chris’ ass
he wouldn’t be able to find his heart
in the dark if he used both hands.
Cristobal, you weren’t the first person
to know the world wasn’t flat,
but you had the cajones to prove it
by sailing east to India by setting out west.
So if there are American Indians
at the Grand Canyon, who would I find
in front of the Taj Mahal?
You were a man ahead of your time Cristobal.
You gave those Cubanos the first Colonoscopy.
It would be six hundred years before the next one.
Thanks for the smallpox,
my children probably deserved it.
And you were six hundred years too early
to hear Henny Youngman say,
“Take my wife-please!” but you took her anyway.
Thanks for the syphilis, she probably deserved it.
Abuse is a cycle, we learn it from those
who inflict it upon us,
as they learned it from their own abusers.
And the circle goes unbroken.
Who whipped your ass, Colon?
What did you take out of these colonies
that you were able to take out of this world
when the syphilis finally took you out?
It’s been six hundred years and the circle
goes unbroken. We are still colonizing the world.
Oh Ferdinand, Oh Isabella, your kingdom
for a history student.
David Blaine [8:45 AM]
The Truth about Americans
I wanted to tell my non American friends the truth about Americans. I wanted to but I can't. For one thing that would involve speaking for everyone from Argentina to the Yukon since America spans three continents. But more pracitcaly, to speak of the U.S.A., I still can't tell anyone the truth. Why? Well because I'm a middle income white man, 49 years old, married with kids, who has lived almost his whole life in the Great Lakes region of the country selling financial services-insurance and banking products. That bars me from telling you the truth because I have never been a woman, or gay, or poor, or wealthy. I have never lived on the West Coast or the East Coast or Down South. I've never been a person of color, never spoken a language other than English as my primary language. I've never farmed the earth, sailed a merchant ship, built houses, worked in a factory or taken care of other peoples health for a living. And I was born here, which keeps me from knowing the truth as lived by those who are immigrants from other parts of the world.
My country is so diverse that it would be impossible for me to explain it to anyone who really wanted to understand it. All I could tell them about was myself and perhaps my own family. That's all I've tried to do here. In the movies Robert De Niro screams "The truth? You can't handle the truth" Well the real matter is, we aren't large enough as human beings to experience anything so broad as total truth. Perhaps only God will know that. For men I am thinking there are only shades of gray. Exceptions to every rule and an exception to every exception.
I've been labeled a moderate because I try to see both sides of an issue and seek common ground. I see that as a good thing, but extremists at either end of the spectrum will accuse a moderate of being a sympathizer. And I thought sympathy was a good thing too. You can always look at things from more than one point of view. In the bible there is a verse on what will happen if you are niether hot nor cold but lukewarm, God will spew you out of his mouth at the judgement. There is also a verse that says blessed are the peacemakers. How can peace be made from one end or the other? How can peace be made from somewhere besides common ground? One side can utterly conquer, but that is not peace, that results in one side being crushed. Genocide? Maybe, but homicide for sure.
I can't tell you the truth about Americans, I really can't. But either can anyone else. I'm sorry. If you quest that truth you are going to have to really want to know, because you are going to have to get to know each one of us, one American at a time. I think it would be a noble lifelong quest. Good luck.
David Blaine [4:00 AM]
Pointy Headed People
If you posted a comment on a previous post, and the whole post is gone,
it's because someone in the blogosphere has been threatening other bloggers.
Yup, you speak kindly of the wrong blogger and you get threats. Friendship is
a dangerous thing you know. People get too friendly and wars start, wait, well anyway I'm sure this blogger knows how to save us from ourselves with his hate.
Sorry, I never had to do this before, and it doesn't feel right. It's pretty sad.
David Blaine [12:38 PM]
A friend e mailed me yesterday, I hand't been to his blog lately, did he do something to offend me. No, I'm wired. I have three blogs of my own, one pretty inactive though. I check in on six different e mail accounts, which are seperated according to business, daily. I maintain two web pages, one for making beer, one for my wifes store. I participate in a couple of chat boards for things ranging from writing to athletics. I have been burning the candle at both ends and it has been noticed at work and at home. I am pulling a few irons out of the fire. No one has done anything "wrong" or offended me. I appreciate each and every one of you who visit and chat, e mail me, and have become such supportive friends. I even appreciate the visitors who oppose me in debate from time to time. I will still post here, but I know that most of my traffic will die down if you don't see my name on the comments at your own blogs. I will visit again, not as often, but I will still be around. And I will answer any e mail. Thanks for your company.
David Blaine [8:43 AM]